How To Prepare Yourselves As A Couple Before The Baby Is Born

Childbirth or 40 weeks of pregnancy affects many of a couple’s  relationships in more ways than one; so it is best that couples prepare themselves for the intense experience of childbirth and earth rocking changes of a new baby. Being more significant for first born, smart couples should look at these changes and prepare themselves to smoothen them.

Some changes and how you should prepare yourself as a couple:

The first change is that your parents and in-laws tart treating you as an adult once you parent a child; they would not only start respecting you, but would also start giving you solicited and unsolicited advice. Just believe they have your and your baby’s interests in mind, helping you to realize the deep love your mother has for you and helping you to relate better to her.  

You would probably not like to be a mum as your mother was, but you should definitely realize that everyone has different methods and that the decisions she took all the same had your best interests at heart. It would help to not feel judgmental and discuss your method of child rearing with her.

Prepare yourself as a couple for childbirth by finding a pediatrician or family doctor for your baby midway through your pregnancy; the best choice would be one that accepts your insurance and takes new patients. Good sources of referral are friends, relatives and neighbors. You could talk to your insurance company how you could add the baby to your policy and make sure how they would cover your labor, delivery and maternity care.

Preparing as a couple for child birth also means keeping the line of communication open with each other at all times right through pregnancy and after childbirth also; fathers like mothers undergo changes after childbirth with some being confused and shocked with the strength of their emotions. It is best to talk over your spouse’s emotions with him.

Creating an informal atmosphere for casual talk over a cup of coffee/tea would help both of you to feel safe to confide in each other. Mothers could keep coming back to the issue, respecting the need for space of fathers. Do not take it personally if he cannot confide; some men find it easier doing it with friends over a glass of beer.

Your friendship may undergo a change during pregnancy and after childbirth; your childless friends may probably find it annoying that now you cannot go out much with them and are pre-occupied with nappies, feeds, and relating every sound or movement your child makes, when you were previously up to fun, drinks and gossip. Ensure however that your friends are true to you and you to their needs; suggest alternative methods of getting together by meeting for a coffee and a chat at weekends or lunchtimes. Take care that when you meet you talk less about the baby and also include other topics in your conversation.

Be prepared as a couple for loving your baby at first sight or waiting a while before you feel the maternal/paternal instinct; either way you would develop a deep and loving relationship with the baby. Also acknowledge that you would at times develop some negative emotions with your child especially during toddler’s tantrums and teenage strops. It is quite normal as parenting is all about feeling a whole gamut of both positive and negative emotions.

An important closing note; as a couple take your own time to know and understand your baby and allow him/her to also do the same, for this is a bonding for life.  

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